waiting...

hello!
Just a quick update on the adoption front...
we are waiting!

• we made a match with L-  she turned 2 on August 8th.
• our hope is to adopt L and bring her home early next year  :)
• our paperwork has been submitted to Russia, and we are waiting for our trip dates (Russia is a "2 trip country"-  a trip to meet your child and a trip to bring your child home)
• we are hopeful that our trip to meet L will be in October (please pray!)
• the big girls have started school-  we love our teachers and are off to a great start
• we've moved back in to our Fieldcrest house...it's incredible.  Way to go, Christman and Missy!
• we are praying for L all day long...the girls talk about her constantly
• we can't wait for the next step in adoption

Thank you for your prayers!
More to come soon-

We made a match!!

It has been a very exciting couple of weeks here in Big D! Of course, it's summer and we are loving being out of school. We swim a LOT, play lots of Legos and Lily "teaches" school, we swim some more, go check on our house on Fieldcrest (did I mention that we are renovating our house this summer??) and play some more. We've gotten to go to Houston-  and had an awesome time with our cousins swimming, playing, and touring the Blue Bell Ice Cream Factory in Brenham. But, best of all...we accepted a referral for adoption. We wanted to ask y'all to pray with us as we process our latest adoption news... About a 2 weeks ago, we were given the names/pictures/bios for several Waiting Children from Russia. After looking over the information, we asked our agency to send us details on 3 little girls:  a 10 month old named E, a 21 month old named L, and a 20 month old named K. Finally, we received detailed medical histories and adoption information for both L and K.  We did not receive any information on E, so we are guessing that she has already been placed for adoption...hurrah!! L has been approved for adoption, but K has not been approved for adoption-  evidently, she has a number of unknown potential health issues that our caseworker is concerned about.  Of course, this is heart-breaking, and we are praying for her like crazy. At this point, we have put a "hold" on L...amazing to think that this could be our new daughter!!  We are all excited- the girls talk about her often, and she is never very far from my heart and prayers.  There are still so many steps to take- yesterday we over-nighted several documents to our agency and we will have to go to immigration and submit paperwork & fingerprints for Russia...more forms!! We are THRILLED to be filling out more forms and answering questions!  We are grateful for the opportunity to get to pray for these sweet girls by name, regardless of where they end up-  we pray that their "forever family" will find them soon.   To be honest, one of the hardest aspects of this situation is that we have "options."  When you have a biological child, you "get what you get and you don't throw a fit."  :) Adoption is different.  You have choices:  and it's almost overwhelming.  It feels like every time you make a choice in one direction (we are hoping for a girl), you eliminate other opportunities (what about all of those sweet boys who need a family??).  I have cried many tears as we turn toward one child and turn away from another.  I have realized that I often trust in myself and not the Lord.  I am constantly reminded- often times by y'all!- that God is in control, that He is sovereign, and that I can trust Him.  And, again, that He loves each and every one of these children. Thanks, friends, for your prayers...keep praying.

Fieldcrest Drive

so...our street-  have I ever mentioned our street?
(I know-  this is a blog about our adoption...hold tight!)

Our street has about 10 houses on it (practically speaking).  We live in Lake Highlands, in a neighborhood mixed with original home-owners and young families (for the most part).  There are a few families with college-aged kids, but for the most part, it's either the older or the younger (wow-  I can't believe I'm considered to be part of the "younger!!")
ANYWAY, on our street, the Matlocks are the only original homeowners left.  The rest of the houses on our block have been bought (within the last 5 years) by younger families.
In 8 houses, we have 20 kids...under the age of 9.  It's awesome.  And crazy.  And really, really great.
To be honest, it's one of the reasons that we decided to adopt-  definitely on the + side.  The love, comradery, and community are invaluable.
 We play outside.  Our kids run in and out of yards.  We watch one another's kids, trade recipes, pray for one another, have parties, shake our fists at the teen-agers who drive too fast, play in sprinklers, send kids to time-out, and give out kisses, band-aids and popsicles.

And then there's Mrs. Mary Jo and Mr. Gibb Matlock.
Oh how Mrs. Mary Jo loves our kids.  She delights in them.  She did a "talk" about birds in her backyard for the kids on our street-  complete with a tape-recording of bird noises and stuffed birds.
She gives out hugs and tells the kids that she loves them (and that if they want to run away, they can run to her house).
Mrs. Mary Jo went to the University of Texas.  She was a Kappa...she still goes to reunions with her Kappa sisters every year-  isn't that sweet?
Just tonight, she called to wish us a Happy Easter.  She always says, "God bless."  And she means it.
She told me that she met some women at her church who had relatives in India...she asked if it might help us get a baby from India.

I told her that we were so grateful that she was thinking of us...but that we were going a different direction.  We were hopeful about adopting a child from Russia.  (more on that later).
Mrs. Mary Jo was great.  She said that she's been praying for us, and she would continue to pray for us.
I told her that we thought we had such a great plan(in adopting from India), but that the Lord promises that He will give us "exceedingly, abundantly more" when we trust in Him.  So, we are trusting in Him.  And we are heading towards Russia.
Mrs. Mary Jo told me that she sometimes has difficulty trusting in the Lord.  I told her that I do, too.  She said that her biggest sin is that she sometimes gives things to God...only to take them back again.
Me, too.
I love that Mrs. Mary Jo shared that with me.
I pray that I would grow more bold and more authentic....like Mrs. Mary Jo.

Of course, she ended the conversation with, "Happy Easter...God bless."

Ready

(an email to Missy)
so, it could be the cookies talking, but I'm feeling like I need to say this out loud:

I'm ready for some info about our newest daughter.

I'm ready to get our girl.

I know that we have the rest of our life with her, and I know that it will all happen in God's timing, and I trust Him.

And I trust that it will happen when He is ready and when we are ready and when she is ready...

but I'm ready to be ready.

It's not that I'm tired of waiting- really, we haven't been waiting that long.  

I'm just ready.

Ready to see her.

Ready to hold her.

Ready for her to meet her sisters.  and ready for her sisters to meet her.

Ready.

I feel like she is somewhere out there and we are all getting ready to be together.  And I don't understand why later is better than sooner.  But, clearly, God's ways are higher than our ways.  Isn't it crazy to think that our daughter has been born (maybe) and that we are all getting ready to be together?  I'm not anxious or nervous-  honestly, I have too much going on to dwell too much on all of it.  But we pray for her all day long.  I'm guessing that's all she needs right now.

just had to say it out loud.

He's Got the Whole World in His Hands

This is an email that Amby and I sent out to our family, community group and Bible study friends...
Although it's several weeks old, it's still fresh in our hearts and minds.  We are thankful for the progress that has been made since we received this email, and we are grateful for new opportunities (more on that later!)

Amby and I received word today (March 3rd) that our Home Study report was sent to India and the Indian representative for our agency (Rajeev) reviewed it... He said that, because of the increased number of Indian citizens adopting Indian orphans (what a great thing), the restrictions for folks outside of India are increasing.  In other words, it was Rajeev's opinion that Amby and I would, ultimately, not be permitted to adopt a child from India.  He said that his thought is that we would be allowed a referral and we would most likely match with a child (they were very encouraging about our Home Study report).  However, he thinks that we would get well down the road and then we would be denied by the Indian government because we already have 3 children.  Although this is not a current limitation, Rajeev feels that the trend (as far as he can tell) is that adoptions will not be approved for families who already have 3 children (at this point, 3 is the max # of children allowed).  He feels that the governing body for adoption in India (CARA) will not approve our adoption, as he has not yet seen an approved adoption for a family in our situation.  And, truly, we have started to receive information about more and more restrictions and changes for Indian adoption.  Although none of these limitations are currently official, it's definitely the direction that CARA is heading. The director of our agency wanted us to know asap, so that we can begin processing the information...his recommendation is that we begin to think about other countries and other opportunities.  He said that he would hate for us to get 12-18 months down the road, only to be denied. Clearly, we are disappointed.  Thankfully, Amby was home when we received the email from our agency's director.   There is a lot to discuss and pray about and think through-   Will y'all please pray for us?  We are confident that there is a child, somewhere out there, who is going to be a part of our family.  We simply want to be faithful.  Please pray that we would be faithful.  We are still very hopeful. Really, this is the first real "hiccup" that we have experienced thus far.  It's a little bit of a roller coaster of emotions-  and we desperately want to be in the "here and now."  We have a long way to go on this journey. Thanks, friends- Grateful for y'all... jenny ps- I know- it's hard to think about all of those orphans in India... And Amby and I are definitely thankful that Indian citizens who live in India are beginning to embrace adoption-  but I want to acknowledge that it's still so hard to know that there are thousands of Indian children who will go to bed tonight without mommies and daddies to tuck them in, sing to them, read to them, and pray for them. But, I know that God loves those boys and girls as much as he loves my girls and your kids. I know that I have already shared this with many of y'all, but I think I need the reminder-  One of the main things God reminded me of when I was in Africa is this: He's got the whole world in His hands.

The Sheer Madness of it All

How's that for a dramatic title?
I must say, I'm feeling a little dramatic, regarding the adoption.
The wheels have ground to a stop.  Does that even make sense?
After receiving the wonderful news that we have been approved to be Potential Adoptive Parents (that's PAP, for all of you who are keeping record of adoption acronyms)!  HURRAY!
After we received our Home Study document to review, we assumed that we would awake to find someone on our doorstep with a child ready for us to adopt (kind of like Ed McMahon with his giant check).  Ok-  so that's a little unrealistic and entirely untrue, but...we did expect a little more than we got.
Which was complete and utter silence.
We got nothin'.
For a week.  And then we emailed our agency-  we were like, "Ummm....so we got our Home Study back and it was awesome.  What's next?"
Our agency emailed us back that our social worker would send the documents-  after that we would be OFFICIALLY approved and we could start receiving referrals.
So, we are back to waiting.  Arg.
Have I mentioned that I am NO GOOD at waiting?  I have to admit that I kind of have a plan for how all of this might work out:  we match with our child this spring.  we submit our court documents before the courts in India go on holiday (this summer).  we travel to India to pick up our child early fall.  we have an entire school year with Kylie and our newest sibling to get to hang out before Kylie goes to school.  See?  Doesn't it all make perfect sense?
Brilliant plan.
What's that?  It's not about me managing the situation or controlling the outcome or figuring it all out?
What?
I mean, really.  What's it going to take for me to learn that it's not about me figuring it all out.  How many times do I have to see that God REALLY DOES have my best interest at heart?  Have I EVER been disappointed in His plan?  His provision?  Have I EVER regretted trusting Him?
Honestly?
Nope.  Not ever.  Not once.  I have not always been able to understand His plan (in the moment).  But as I look back on my life-  I am truly humbled.  And more than a little chagrined.  After all-  who am I to question Him?  He set the world in motion...He came to earth to save us.  He cares about every detail of my life.  He loves the sweet child that we are waiting for-  He loves her (or him!) more than I can possibly imagine.
And so, whether it is tomorrow or a year from tomorrow (oh goodness, I pray that it is not 2 years from tomorrow!), it is going to be the perfect time.
So, we are waiting...

On another completely unrelated note-
Missy brought her camera (and Rob's awesome fancy lens) to the playground this afternoon after school.
Here's an amazing shot she took of Gracie...

And another one-

Great, right?
Y'all have a good night...

I lied.

Ok-  so, I lied.  I said that I thought you'd be bored by a detailed post about our last month and that I'd tell you about it in bullet form.
That was my intention...but I decided to share a little more.
Where shall I start?
How about our home visit!

As I'm sure many of you know, a Home Visit is just that:  a social worker visits your home, checks it out, asks you numerous questions, interviews the folks in your family, and then decides if you are suitable to be adoptive parents.
Ummm-- no pressure.
Here's how it all went down:
we received a call on Thursday night (a few weeks ago).  Yes, that's right-  the Thursday night before the Friday that we were going to Houston to watch Amby and Jeremy (my older brother) run in the Houston Marathon.  Amby and Jeremy have been training for months to run the marathon, and we were pumped to join Linda and our cousins to cheer them on.
But I digress.
Ok-  so, we got a phonecall from our social worker to set up our Home Study.  He said that he'd like to visit us to talk about the adoption.  (thankfully, Amby answered the phone or I guarantee that I would have gone in to semi-charming (annoying) babbling idiot mode)  Eric (the social worker) said that he was available any evening we'd prefer-  the sooner the better.  We were so thrilled for this new step in the process, that we immediately agreed to the following Monday...nevermind that we'd be in Houston all weekend.  Nevermind that I'd be leaving for Africa the following Friday.  Full steam ahead!  Bring it on!
So, the madness ensued.  We cleaned our closets!  We cleaned the garage!  We cleaned the refrigerator!  By golly, we were going to be so clean-  how could he refuse?
Fast forward 24 hours.
My sweet, sweet nephew got the flu.  We decided that the girls and I shouldn't go to Houston-  Amby would fly down, run the marathon, then fly back.  Poor guy-  very anti-climactic (he did great, by the way-  finished faster than anticipated...especially given the less-than-ideal weather conditions!  Jeremy, too).
Our weekend didn't turn out as planned, but I was able to clean out the freezer, with the extra time I had.

Ok-  I know...it sounds like I was slightly OCD.  BUT, we were told that the social worker could (and would) check anywhere and everywhere to be certain that our house was a viable option for a child to live safely.  There's a fine line between due diligence and control issues.  I may have crossed that line a few times over the weekend.  It's probably in Amby's best interest that he was in Houston.

Finally, Monday arrived.  We had a plan:  our social worker would arrive.  He'd talk to the girls, then Missy and Kyle would swoop in and take them (the girls) away & Amby and I would charm our social worker and he would see that we were the ideal family for a child...bad-a-bing-bad-a-boom.
done.
And that's pretty much what happened.
Yes, I was a babbling idiot.  Yes, I'm sure I over-shared during my interview (he talked to us together as well as separately).  Yes, Amby is much more relaxed and natural.  No, the social worker didn't eat the dip I made as a last ditch effort to convince him that we were normal.  Who was I kidding?
And the girls had a great time at the Richardson's-  they ate chicken and noodles and played board games.  Heaven.
And now we are waiting.  Supposedly, we will hear if we are approved for adoption in the next couple of days.  As hard as it is to wait, we have peace.  It's a crazy "peace that passes understanding."  It's almost like it's out of our control.  Oh.  That's right-  it is.  Out of our control, I mean.
Thankfully, He's got the whole world in His hands.
And that includes our house-
and our hearts.
We are grateful.
And waiting...